I got a msg on FB from a dear gal pal asking me if it's okay to be facebook friends with a guy she was crazy about back in the old days - some 20 years ago. Honestly, I was surprised that she would ask me, because I don't see anything wrong with it. Of course in those days it was obvious to everyone that she was heads over heels in crush with this guy. Or maybe not obvious to everyone but me.
Anyway, I told her there's nothing wrong with befriending someone who we already consider as "real life" friends from the old 'hood. Besides whatever feelings she had for him were based on juvenile emotions. Plus, both of them have moved on, married and have kids, and are happily enjoying the next stage in their lives. So what's wrong.
Then I asked what her husband's reaction was to this development. According to her she's still waiting for the right timing to tell him. She fears endless teasing from her very understanding husband :)
Now I have to blog about this because in relation to this I was in the same position when a boy I really liked in high school turned up on FB and sent in a request to be my friend. Without hesitation, I accepted.
While I had major crush on this guy back in the day when I weighed less than 100 lbs, I certainly did not carry whatever emotional baggage I had for him around me to this day. So it was just fine for me.
I have doubts about him though. I am fond of making comments on my friends photos and wall posts and when I noted that one of the "very innocent" comments I made on his photo was missing I had doubts and was a bit miffed. However, he replied to this missing comment. What's up with that?
So would you fb friend an old flame, crush, etc?
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
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2 comments:
If it was just a crush and they weren't an item, I think it's okay. Me, I have not added my ex's. I just don't feel comfortable and I don't want hubby to feel uncomfortable too =)
with or without a hubby, it can sometimes get tricky. fb is becoming scary to me because i once dated a guy whose sisters and cousins were my close friends. while it's okay to be in touch with my girlfriends, i don't want to be in touch with the guy. it might make my ex's wife uncomfortable.
hay. i wish fb has more of the exclusivity it used to provide.
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