Take Time To Smell The Flowers

Enjoy the little things.


Bask in the sunshine.


Dance in the wind.


Make a new friend.


Remember to always take time to smell the flowers.

Mindless Mumblings.

Almost a week ago today, the sad news that Philippine movie personality Liezl Martinez succumbed to the big C came to me as I was about to sleep for the night. Her passing affected me in a way I did not expect. I guess one reason is that I’m still whirling from losing my niece to the same dreaded disease. Another reason is that I have been following (okay reading since I don’t have an account) her tweets and Instagram for a while now. I enjoy looking at her photos. I don’t recall watching any of her films; I don’t think she had many. I wasn’t even maka-Albert (Albert fan) during the Regal Babies days. But her passing saddened me. It felt like air was let out of my balloon. Rest in peace Liezl, another one gone way too soon.

Anyway, things are the way they’re supposed to be. Did not go on any trips, long or short; however, there’s one in the offing that I’m quite excited about. I’ll let you in on the planning soon.

Yes, I’ve returned to Zumba. I missed two weeks of February because we were too busy with the niece being in the hospital and then the funeral. But I’m back. Now if I could only lose some weight.

Spring is officially arriving tomorrow. Out here in Cali, we’ve had Spring since after Fall. I don’t recall any winter like conditions here. And because our winter was the driest in how many years, the drought conditions are getting worse. I read somewhere that the water supply we have right now is only good for one year. And then what?

I’ve been telling anyone who would care to listen this. Why not transport all the extra snow that the other parts of this great country received this winter and dump it all in California? That would solve some of this state’s problems on water, right? Kidding aside, how feasible is it to do that? Pipeline from one coast to the other?

Another thing on my mind is the worsening traffic in the Bay Area. Can we not utilize our waters to ease congestion? Is there a way to make our ferry system affordable and appealing to the commuters? Talks have been going in the past about a ferry depot in Hercules. As a matter of fact, construction of housing and stores have been put up near the location. If my husband reads this he would tell me to attend the town hall meeting. We have attended one time and it was about this same issue. I believe that was nearly 5 years ago.

Speaking of commute, I was able to share my route, the scenic route, to my co-worker. I did not realize we live near each other. And when I told her about my route she was flabbergasted that such a route exist. When you’re commuting in the I-80 in the East Bay you are expected to have a plan B or route B because if you rely on taking the freeway the rest of the way you’ll be in big trouble. The most obvious plan B is to take San Pablo Avenue. It somewhat parallels the freeway. The only problem with this route is that everyone knows about it and it’s the first one they take when something goes wrong on I-80. There’s another route that also uses San Pablo Avenue, but this one takes Arlington and you’d end up in Oakland.

Now this is the route I use nowadays. I don’t even bother to go to I-80 even though I see it’s clear near my house. I know it’s jammed in Richmond or in Berkeley, so what’s the point.

I take the backroads. My commute is through the rolling green hills with grazing cows, and electric poles and lines covered with birds, then it comes out to a curvy San Pablo Dam Road that passes by dams and hills and Orinda town where I take the freeway to Oakland.

My co-worker has been taking the route for days now. Today she was beaming from ear to ear and said her commute is down to 40 minutes. Well that’s still long, but better than I-80. I’m just glad I shared this super secret route, which actually was shared to me by others as well. Pass it on.

Wow

Amid all the despair and sadness of the past few weeks, I managed to find something really beautiful. I thought God gave me this day to tell me that things will be better.

My niece had lost her 3-year battle with pancreatic cancer the day before this video was taken. When she was first diagnosed I was about to leave for my India/Bangladesh vacation in 2012. I remember that clearly because I phoned my brother just to give him a heads up that I will be out of the country for a month and our elderly mother who lives with me has all the sitter she needed at that time. I always ring my brothers and email them later whenever I leave so that they know my whereabouts and at the same time ask if they could drop by the house to see mom, as she gets sad when I'm not around.

Anyway, when I rang him he said he's in LA because my niece is in the hospital. They discovered something in her insides they don't know yet, but likely cancerous in nature. She was a very strong intelligent woman with 3 small children, ages 10, 7 and 5. The tumor was small when they found it in her pancreas, chemo blasted it or something. She had a few months of health. But it came back, more aggressive or something. I don't know really what happened. I get different versions depending on who I talk to. Needless to say, pancreatic cancer is tough to beat.

Long story short, she kept battling until the very last breath. My SIL (her mom) told us that under the respirator she mumbled: IT'S TIME. She bravely chose her ending. I don't know how she did that, but you know I'm not very surprised because while alive she's been doing things I'm afraid to touch with a 10 foot pole. And while technically I am her aunt, our age gap is merely 7 years and we're more "cousins".

She was in the ICU for a couple of weeks before she passed. We saw her on the first week and she was without respirator, but by the next week she just couldn't breathe on her own. The chemo made her lung linings (pleura I think) very thin that enabled water to fill her lungs making it very difficult to breathe. She had tube on her side, or back, to drain fluid. She was suffering too much.

Anyway, when the plan to take a short weekend trip to the mountains she was in status quo. Nothing was said about taking the respirator off. On Ash Wednesday, my hubs phone rang while we were in church. I stepped out to take the call and my brother said it's bad news. Her ICU doctors said they cannot do anything else for her. The husband asked if he could take her case in Stanford for second opinion. My travel plans were hanging in the balance until Friday afternoon.

We decided to push through with the trip on Friday evening. When we were leaving for our trip on Saturday morning, I rang my brother to check on them. They were arranging funeral services. That was when I found out that my niece and her family decided that she would go that Saturday, respirator would be taken out at 2 pm.

With our bags packed we drove to the hospital to say our last goodbye. Other nephews and nieces picked up my mom and drove her to the hospital for their last goodbye as well.

The whole drive, I had one eye on my phone. By 2 pm, I texted my nephew to ask if he's still in the hospital. By 3 pm, I got a text saying she passed on. It was a tough road trip. Road trips usually give me boost, a therapy for whatever ailed me in past.

The snow was unexpected. Days before the trip I kept calling the lodge to inquire about weather. When all I heard was sunny skies without chance of snow, I packed accordingly. Then on our second day, we awoke to this.....

I captured our travel buddies going to their car to get to the restaurant for breakfast.

Not my first winter wonderland experience, but it's the first in a very very long time.

Who knew snowfall can be very comforting and therapeutic?

I hope....

I can eat ice cream with the same reckless abandon as that of a child.

A lot of things happening lately. Will try to write.

Sad Day

I haven't been posting here lately, but I thought I'd put my feelings into writing. Except that I really don't think I understand my feelings. I know I am sad and shocked, but other than that I have no idea.

You see this morning an hour or so after my shift, my husband called. Now this is a routine call, every morning he calls to check if I get to work okay and on time. He leaves home before me. But this time he said he had bad news. Our friend and realtor died last night.

When my husband was single and working in suburbia (he's still working in the 'burbs), he rented a room with a childless couple. The house has 4 bedrooms and at one time all 3 bedrooms were rented. Finding a place to live in is quite difficult. Getting an apartment is not easy on the pocketbook. My husband being a quiet guy, shuns partying, found the ideal place with this elderly couple. They doted on him like a son they never had and in return he helps out with little things the couple couldn't do themselves - the husband being handy around the house.

This relationship grew stronger and even after we got married we remained close to them. They treated me as the daughter-in-law they never had. We take them out to dinner occassionally, or invite them over for supper - and they do the same for us.

The woman has a sister, D, the realtor. We became close to her as well and treated her like family. She was the one who got us our house. She was very patient with us when we were looking for a house. She used to tell me I cannot get a house because I like every house I saw. As a matter of fact, the house we live in now is one of those very few that I didn't really like. But my husband drilled some sense into me and I saw the potential. I'm glad I listened. I love our house and always think of D as the reason why we have the house.

When we closed escrow and I got the key to the house, she didn't want to accept her commission. She said we could use it to buy stuff for the house. After pointing out that she earned the commission, she then gifted us with a new laptop as a housewarming present.

D was a good friend. She and her husband, like her sister and her husband, are childless. Her sudden death raises so many questions. Who will look after her frail husband? What will happen to their house?

It's just a sad day.

In other news:

.....I'm still going to zumba (yay!)

.....I think I'm getting arthritis (no!)

.....We had friends over last Friday night and had lots of fun. House was shaking with laughter. Hubby drank too much, got sick all night long. Was hung over the next day. Glad he was at home when all this happened.

.....I'm going away for a night at a cabin near Sequioa National Park. However I will miss two parties because of this - my niece Ashley's 2nd bbq at the park birthday party and Tempest's Oscar night party. Oh I so wanted to go to both of those, especially Tempest's party because her husband is a professional pastry chef or is it chocolatier. Oh boy he makes really good chocolate yummies.

That's all for now.

Disappointments and Hopes

I started to write something here about what happened earlier in the day about someone's alleged prejudice against the third sex. Then I deleted it. What if he was only joking? However, he doesn't joke around that way. It was simply too jarring an incident. Why would he say things like that? I'm disappointed with him. I'm disappointed with me because I always thought he is an upstanding guy.

Even if he's only joking, I'm afraid I'm never going to see him in the same light again.

Now to more rosy thoughts.....

The Golden State Warriors are unbelievably good this year. Many are hopeful - and confident - that they would go past the first round of eliminations. I join the multitude of #dubnation who's wish is to see them win it all this year.

Vacation can't come soon enough.....

But I won't be taking one in another 4 or 5 months. I think a week-long beach holiday is due. I'm starting to get things done, like booking the resort, and the flight. For the most part this year will be quiet in terms of travel because we plan on visiting family in Bangladesh for Christmas. My husband didn't have Christmas with his family in 20+ years, so I say it's overdue, don't you think?

With this in plan, most of our vacation time would be used for this trip, limiting the budget allotment and time allotment for any other destination.

Meantime, my Christmas tree is still up and the so are the decors. I am plain too lazy to do anything. I've been having major headaches lately and when I get them I just wanna lay in bed with the cats and do nothing. I really should go to the doctor - again ask for diagnotic test even though the ones done on me before were all negative.

By the next post, I would have definitely packed all the Christmas decorations and to the garage they will reside until I fished them out again in 11 months.

First Week of 2015 in the Books

That is right, the first week of the new year is down the drain. Pretty soon February is here. So what new things happened in this young new year so far? Let me tell you:

• I am doing Zumba, 2x a week.  I am loving it, but my muscles don't.
• Veggies and fruits dominate my diet.  Trying my best to make 2015 the year I finally lost weight and excercised.
• Bye bye cable.  We're doing Direct TV now.
• Reading, reading, reading.  I have read about 3 since the last week of December.  Yay me!

Projects that are still pending are:

• Sewing.  I have lots of them.
• Cross stitch project that has been on the shelf for a couple of years at least.
• Want to do greeting card from scratch.
• Scrapbook of my travel souvenirs - like all the train tickets, museum pass, knick knacks and paper and coin currencies from different countries I've visited.  Somewhere in my box is the makeshift 4 x 4 cardboard with handwritten Arabic stuff that became our train ticket from Alexandria to Cairo when the computer system went down in Alexandria and no real tickets could be issued.  I saved it.

I think that's good for now, project-wise.  That is plenty and I'm going to dance the dance of my people if I got to 80% of my goal. 

In the meantime, let me eat my fruit and push most of the carbs out of my plate.  I'm trying here.  Really trying.....hard.